Today was a very discouraging day in my battle with Syringomyelia (SM). I woke up a lot during the night due to the pain. I can remember one time during the night that was the most agonizing where I sat straight up in the bed and tears involuntarily streamed down my face. It just epitomized the way I have been feeling every day for the last several months. It is hard to stay positive when your treatment didn’t work and you are actually hurting worse than you were before.
Today was my first day back to work after my trigger point injections and I didn’t even make it all the way through. I left early and I left in pain. I came home and took two of my pain pills and it took a great deal of the edge off but I hate those things. I’ve wanted to stay away from those things as long as possible and I realize that it’s no longer feasible for me to avoid them.
My victories today were that I didn’t have my hand go numb and my migraine finally left today. I was so glad to have those two victories because it’s been a difficult journey for the last several days. I am hoping that I will sleep tonight and my bags under my eyes will fade a little bit. The reactions I got from people today when they saw me without makeup (I didn’t feel up to putting it on today) was pretty eye opening. Apparently the dark circles have affected my appearance these days. I hope that the meds they gave me will help me to sleep so that I can lose these bags. I am going to try extra hard to keep positive and will take every day one minute at a time.
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